Allah Rakka RahGod!

As my brother scanned the PDF of Civil Service Examination results published in UPSC's website, I was sitting listening to "Al Maddath Maula". It has always been like this. And as my name was right up there with an All India Rank of 77,there were tears of joy to be shed but there has been a bigger moment in my life which involved more cathartic reactions of shouting and crying. In that moment too,my brother was there,hugging me in joy. As a bonus,my mother also provided company in front of the television as A.R.Rahman announced to the world "Ella Pugazhum Iraivanuke". This was Rahman winning the Oscars in February,2009.

We (This includes my brother and so many other Rahmaniacs) have grown up celebrating Rahman's success as our own. I was born in 1991,a year when Rahman was a year away from immortality. My mother always recounts that the first song I ever sang (in gibberish) was "Aadhal Oojave enge nee enge anneer azhiyudhadi anne". I killed the song but my life began that moment. From then on,it has been a bond which can only be aptly described in Rahman's own song lines : "Idhu piravigal dhorum vidadha bandham, pirivennum theeyil vizhadha sondham". ("This is a bond which remains across many births, this is a relation which does not know separation")

At the age of five,I was supposed to dance for the "Spirit of Rangeela" in my school annual day function but I dropped out at the last moment fearing I will be shamed before a cute classmate of mine whose name is lost in the slippery sands of time. At the age of seven,I was totally captivated by a cousin, Sathya Narayanan ,who bought original cassettes of ARR's albums and had a picture of ARR in his wallet. I remember the first time I listened to "Maari Mazhai Peyadho" when the new sounds and Shahul Hameed's vocals brought thundershowers to my incipient mind.

This romance peaked in 2005-06 when I teamed up with my neighborhood Rahmaniac Satish to buy all new Rahman cassettes on the day of release. I wrote tenth standard exams listening to "Swades" and I faced twelfth standard battles with "Jaage Hain/Ore Kana" by my side. In college,I used up a lot of my blogspace to write about Rahman. Even a post on General Elections had a picture of Rahman with the indelible ink. He was that indelible from my mind-space.

College life threw up a group of wonderfully infuriating classmates who knew that the easiest way to provoke me was to ridicule Rahman's music.Jawaharlal Nehru memorably quipped once, " One must never visit USA for the first time". This applies to ARR's music also as listening to ARR's music for the first time can unsettle us totally. This happened many times in college life when we dismissed a new ARR song in the initial listens and then came back to the same song to cry to Rahman "Mannipaya? Mannipaya ? Oru naal veruthen maru naal sirithen!". ("Will you forgive me ? I hated you one day and smiled seeing you the next")

As my preparation for Civil service exams began in 2011, Rahman gifted me the greatest album of his career in which my eighth favorite track is "Tum Ho",a song which can easily enter many all time love song listings. Cracking this exam became a tough task with me failing twice,once in 2012 and once in 2013. But Rahman was always there around me,making Chitra sing to my ears : "Thodu vaanam thoda pogum bodhu dhooram dhooram pogum,irundhalum adhai theendi paarkum kaalam vandhu serum". ("The sky keeps going far away even as we try to touch it, but a day will come for sure when we embrace the sky")

Solo bus trips to Besant Nagar Beach with "Nenje Yezhu",discussing songs with Rahmaniacs (This has attained esoteric levels by trying to list ARR songs with Nadhaswaram interludes,ARR bgms which blend two songs etc),verbal fights and celebrations with members from TCC (a vibrant FB group whose members are known for their candour and wit),superstitiously listening to ARR's spiritual/Sufi songs playlist before entering the exam hall (This has gone to extreme levels when I have waited for all the songs to finish playing before entering the exam hall at the last minute) and listening to "Yeh Jo Des Hai" on long sleepless nights are some moments I cherish forever from these four years of exam preparation.

In the last few months,even as I was waiting for the results of  civil service exams, I got recruited into state government and a public sector bank. Rahman warned me patiently," Not every road you come across is one you have to take,no sometimes standing still can be the best move you ever make" through a song in "Bombay Dreams".For once,I didn't heed to Rahman's advice and joined the state government job.

Now ,as the civil service results come in ,I am reminded of the classic lines from "Nadaan Parindey" : "Koi bhi le rasta,tu hai tu mein basta,apne hi ghar aayega tu" ("Whatever road or path you take,you will finally reach home"). I have finally come home to join Indian Administrative Service. Usually,musicians compose background score for scenes shot already. In my case, I have shot the movie of my life thus far to fit ARR's music. I know that my career is just beginning and that the path ahead is fraught with challenges but I also know that A.R.Rahman is with me always singing , "Vaane en mel saaindhalume naan meendu kaatuven, nee ennai konjam konjinal nilaavai vaanguven" ("Even if the sky falls down on me, I will rise again. If you are with me to show care, I will conquer even the moon"). Thank you, Guru!

koi bhi le rasta
tu hai tu bebasta
apne hi ghar aayega tu - See more at: http://www.bollymeaning.com/2011/09/o-naadaan-parindey-ghar-aa-ja-lyrics.html#sthash.kVPzvooj.dpuf

koi bhi le rasta
tu hai tu bebasta
apne hi ghar aayega tu - See more at: http://www.bollymeaning.com/2011/09/o-naadaan-parindey-ghar-aa-ja-lyrics.html#sthash.kVPzvooj.dpuf

koi bhi le rasta
tu hai tu bebasta
apne hi ghar aayega tu - See more at: http://www.bollymeaning.com/2011/09/o-naadaan-parindey-ghar-aa-ja-lyrics.html#sthash.kVPzvooj.dpuf